


The Avengers’ (Totally Normal, Nothing-to-See-Here) Reunion

by Meatball42



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Crack, Fashion & Couture, Gen, Post-Avengers (2012)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-02
Updated: 2017-12-02
Packaged: 2019-02-09 10:09:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12885612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meatball42/pseuds/Meatball42
Summary: The Avengers reassemble... with some revisions.





	The Avengers’ (Totally Normal, Nothing-to-See-Here) Reunion

**Author's Note:**

> We've all thought about it at one point or another, be honest.
> 
> This story is meant to be read in the posh British accent of your preferred gender.

In the months since the Chitauri invasion of New York City, the so-called Avengers had been spread far and wide. From Thor’s return to Asgard, to the Widow’s disappearance into the ether, to Dr. Banner’s return to India, the Avengers were scattered. It was several months later that developments in intelligence led to their reassemblage at Stark Tower in New York.

The first to arrive was Captain Steven Rogers, resplendent in a supple leather jacket and long jeans suitable for motorcycling. Steve was windswept and pink-cheeked from his ride into New York, and along with his updated haircut, he seemed like an entirely different man from the one who’d let the city several months previously. He was warmly greeted by an overworked but happy Pepper Potts.

The next to enter was Bruce Banner, presentable in the mud-brown slacks and loose-fitting, dusty blue button-up that no amount of subtle comments had convinced him to replace. The scientist was only coming from his new apartment on the floor below, so he brought enough tea for everyone and soon set a kettle to boil. “It’s relaxing,” he explained, and Steve and Pepper nodded sagely.

Tony Stark slammed through the lounge on his way to his private rooms, interrupting the peaceful small talk of those already present with loud interrogatives, backhanded compliments, and a distinct odour of metal and oil. Within fifteen seconds, he was gone again, but it was enough to leave the two men behind him blinking uncertainly. Pepper Potts merely breathed a quiet sigh and redirected the conversation.

Thor’s crashing arrival on the balcony summoned Tony back, now in a casually stunning dark blue designer suit. Prince Thor was dressed as ever, in armour and a flowing red cape, proudly wielding his mighty hammer Mjolnir. He was jovial upon seeing the Avengers again, and his hair was slightly longer than the last time they’d seen him. Otherwise, he was unchanged.

While the room was busy with Thor’s appearance and somewhat painfully enthusiastic greetings, its occupants failed to notice the subtle entry of Natasha Romanoff, clad in a breathtakingly casual outfit of deep green blouse and jeans. In fact, no one saw her at all until Tony turned from Thor, rubbing his hand in pain, and swore loudly. Natasha merely smiled as the others saw her and startled.

A half-hour later, when the food had arrived and the reunion was in full swing, the elevator doors opened. Clint Barton half-stepped, half-stumbled in, bow at the ready, then froze when he met the eyes of his colleagues. “What?” he asked.

  

Clint took in the reactions of the others: red-faced Steve, confused Thor, Pepper with her hand over her dropped jaw, Bruce opening and closing his mouth in shock, and Natasha rubbing her forehead.

“What on God’s green Earth are you wearing?” Tony asked.

“Wasn’t your hair darker when we met?” Thor asked at the same time.

Everyone looked at Thor, then went back to staring at Clint.

“They said we were assembling,” he answered. He lowered his bow awkwardly. “This is my new uniform.”

Steve cleared his throat. “What… happened to your old uniform?”

“That was for undercover work. This is for Avenging!” Clint grinned, confident that the issue had been dealt with. “And I had to dye it. This is my natural hair color,” he said to Thor.

“‘Dye it’?” Thor repeated.

“So you take certain chemicals and rub them in your hair, and it changes color,” Clint explained.

Thor nodded thoughtfully.

“Are we really not addressing this?” Tony said loudly. “It was bad enough having a guy fight with a bow and arrow and no arm coverage, now you look like a stripper with a death wish.”

“Why would I need arm coverage?” Clint asked, scratching his head with his free hand. “I’m an Avenger.”

Bruce got up and left the room.

“I think the Hawk looks masterful!” Thor proclaimed. “His war-armor will strike fear into the hearts of our enemies. And the purple is quite original.”

“Hey, thanks!”

**Author's Note:**

> I REGRET NOTHING


End file.
